Root System

So the other day, after finding a quote, I went hunting on the interwebs and found a book called To Dream, Perchance to Soar.

It's a fiction book, set in a (slightly) alternate universe in Paris and the surrounding countryside.  In this version of France, besides a few minor technological and political differences, there are also winged people who have emigrated in and chosen to make France their home.  There is also a girl/young woman who wants very much to be winged, herself.  And the story follows her.

The book has a lot of slice-of-life aspects, which I found very enjoyable, but it's very hard for us to describe that sort of thing without sounding rather dull.  So maybe we'll try to describe some of our favorite details later when we're in better form for language. :)

In any case, when it isn't describing flying backpacking trips or french (and winged-person) food... It gets incredibly real.  Some of it is obviously based on trans experiences, both of transitioning and how others react to you.  And a lot of that... either I had experienced or someone I know has.  The description of how information and support gets passed through the grapevine to those who need it made me feel especially warm. 

And their descriptions of dysphoria... fuck, too real.  But also hopeful in a way because they are tied to the joys of the "other" form.

On the other hand, it's totally possible to read it more literally as talking about otherkin/therian things.

There's recently been a push to say that otherkin and trans are completely different.  However, while they definitely aren't the same and there are some pretty serious differences in how the two things interact with society* .  There's still definitely a lot overlap and some possibilities for talking and learning.  For instance, this book mostly hit me with feelings on a transexual level - even though it's literally about some people's Wing!Feels.  And I have had some pretty useful discussions with other trans 'kin - and it's not always the trans stuff in one conversation and the 'kin stuff in another and never the two shall meet.

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On a different note, I'd also be very interested to write something from the perspective of someone who's in the process of "losing their wings". (They exist in this universe too :) )  The book doesn't go very much into that because it's focusing on other stuff and it can't tell all the stories at once. :)  But given how serious it is about the joys of flight, it would be neat to see the other angle.

I can feel how it might end up feeling more connected to the earth, having the weight and solidity slowly flow (back) into your bones (for the first time) now that you don't need them to be hollow for flight. Based on the way this book describes it, I can see being rooted as a process of "losing your wings" and then "losing them again".  The ones that let human feet float above the ground so much when you run.  And feeling another layer of gentle weight settle around you and in you.


*(The big one being there's no real way to "pass" as whatever creature, and so there's also not the same safety issues and tangled politics around passing.)

Being plant-like is an incredibly important part of our system. It's an experience shared by almost everyone in some degree or another, and it ties us together. So we've written a bit about it below:

Sorry for any inconsistencies in pronouns, it happens when shifting between being one and many.

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Plant-ness – plants may not have eyes, or nerves. But they do have senses, responses. Noticing light and shadow and by chemistry sending messages to grow in a different way.

Plants have a way of being in the world. Patterns which are familiar to me. Patterns of being aware, of responding to sunlight, to shadow, to water, to all the people and creatures and sensations in the world.

There is a time for everything, a time for sun and a time for shadow. I know the sun can burn, both my human skin and my inner heart. But in general, even though I know my human body eats food (and I enjoy that a lot), sunlight and rain feel like joy to me, like sustenance, like rightness.

A while back when I was taking a plant evolution class, the teacher said something interesting – I forget the exact words, but the gist was this: In order to understand why plants do things, you have to think differently, you have to think passively. That's the greatest hurdle to most people understanding. When something bad happens, you move away. For a plant, when something happens – they cannot move, they have to deal with whatever is happening right where they are so what do you do then? But I have a movement disorder, this is my life. If something happens, I can't always run, smooth talk my way out of it. So this is what happens instead - Learning to deal with things right where we are.

We've learned a million ways to deal.

And when I do move – to move is to change. A million cells growing. Chambers filling and emptying of liquid. To move you have to become a new person, a slightly different one that can do what you need to do. Movement is a process and it isn't simple.

So where does that leave us?
Chemistry – changing what exists into what is needed.
Changing scents to colors, colors to feelings, until I find the thing I need to go forward. This is also called synaesthesia. Outward changes, too. Hearing someone's difficulty, listening, taking it in, turning it around in my head until it falls into a new configuration, giving them that new understanding back. Maybe they see something they didn't before.  Shaping clay.   Making bread - turning raw ingredients into food. That is a familiar purpose to an orchard tree. :)

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"If you can't find your heart's desire in your own backyard, you never really lost it to begin with"
-Angels in America by Tony Kushner